i apologize

i apologize first off for the tardiness of this post, i know i havent devoted real time to this blog in a while and i hope that you will take the incredible rambling and matt themed nature of this one as an apology. its been a long snow day and the fact that im just now getting to this shows exactly how well i am at prioritizing and time management.

However i digress

first off ive been wanting to post something about this for a while, and that is

my top 25 turn ons and turn offs in females. if you know me, you know that i do love girls a large amount, maybe too much sometimes, so females if you are in fact reading this blog which is doubtful i must admit take due notice and correct yo self before you wreck yo self

turn offs

1. weird hands

2. hair thats really short

3. bad teeth

4. lack of intelligence

5. bad sense of humor or just doesnt get mine- as in if youre too serious, or dont know how to laugh at yourself and others and

6. only communicates through texting

7. texts in the middle of a conversation

8. if shes a redneck...

9. too nice, you have to have alittle bit of naughtiness in you somewhere ahah

10. bad kisser- pretty much a deal breaker

11. snobby

12. racist

13. out of shape, a little extra is ok if its well distributed but i mean, you can only go so far....

14. bad smile

15. enjoys making fun of people and starting drama

16. attention whore, i like to pay attention to you, just not all the time

17. clingy, another deal breaker, idk why, a lil clingy is cute dont over do it or FATALITY

18. says "like" and "uh" all the time

19. always texts you with mullllltiiiiippllllleeee leettterrrrsssssss, really fucking annoying

20. bad grades. i cant do dumb, sorry,

21. smokes tobacco, no go sorry

22. not a deep person, if i cant go from talking about the weather to talking about our feelings without being awkward, then youve got a problem,

23. not a risk taker, thats just lame, no one likes a square

24. doesnt like to party, see 23.

25. parties too much, there is a limit ladies.

Turn ons

1. pretty smile

2. nice laugh

3. cute mannerisms, like the way you look at me when you talk, the way you act, etc

4. intelligent, awesome if i can discuss life and philosophical shit with you,

5. in good shape, im active and always doing stuff so you have to be able to keep up

6. bubbly, i love when you have lots of energy

7. good sense of humor, if you can just smile at half the crazy shit i do and not judge me

8. likes to party, if you like to party we're gonna hit it off at least a little bit

9. good taste in music, if you like a lot of interesting music, thats great,

10. if you can swim, thats good, i love the water so you better love it too

11. likes to do stuff, im not the type to sit around doing nothing all the time

12. romantic in private and even in public

13. good kisser

14. knows what her good assets are and how to show them off

15. not jealous when girls flirt with me, you gotta have the confidence that im gonna choose you beacuse then, i will.

16. if you can sing hammana hammana hammana

17. pretty eyes, doesnt matter what color, if i catch my breath when i look at you

you gots it goin on

18. funny

19. good taste in food

20. likes to look like we're a couple

21. brags about me

22. compliments me even thoug i deny it i still like it

23 tells me how she feels about stuff and doesnt play any weird ass mind games

24. puts as much into it as i do. haha no pun intended

25. fun